Dragged into Shady Company By My Company

So I am dragooned into taking up arms in our march towards democratic freedom from corporate borgdom etc. the glory of open systems etc etc Linux to be new watchword under pain of sanctions and so forth.

Yesterday I found out from our Unix groo that

1. The Suse Linux boot disc has an underlying FAT file system¹ that cannot be deleted or "it won't boot"
2. The Linux cluster control consoles we just bought run embedded XP², without which "nuthin' wurks"
3. One of the suggested file systems for our new enterprise solution is not to be used on account of its future is uncertain due to the inventor currently awaiting trial for murder³

So, to recap: Our Linux systems are closely intertwined with MS XP anyway and the Linux community is apparently comprised of violent alleged criminals rather than the peaceful Finns I had been led to understand ran the show. Thus, by moving to Linux we don't rid ourselves of our dependancy on Microsoft, but we do get the chance to be associated with alleged criminals of the most virulent stripe.

I already have a smoke machine⁴. Anyone got a mirror?

1: As in the same one used in Microsoft's DOS and Windows AnythingYouLike
2: As in Microsoft XP
3: Hans Reiser, no relation to Paul Reiser (who did try to kill Sigourney Weaver but ended up getting eaten by seven-foot tall aliens instead)
4: See A Little Night Madness